Review: I Wish You Well, Criterion Theatre
A musical about Gwyneth Paltrow’s skiing accident 2016 sounds like an unlikely premise for a night out at the theatre. But, as well as being the campest show in town, this was one of the most hilarious and entertaining evenings I have spent at the theatre in a very long time. As one of the characters says, it could only have been dreamed up by gay men.
The authors in question are Rick Pearson and Roger Dipper; names to remember. Their riveting music and ingenious lyrics were reminiscent of the sophisticated comedy word play of Harold Arlen and Yip Harburg. But the whole ensemble deserve praise, from the on-stage musicians under Debbi Clark, to the lively staging direction of Shiv Rabheru, and masterful choreography by dance legend Arlene Phillips and produced by Paul Taylor-Mills. But the cast of four sold this show with high energy, powerful vocals, great moves, clever gags and campness dialled up to 11.
Set in Utah’s Deer Valley, a small-town courtroom, this tells the story of how the arrival of a Hollywood celebrity turned the heads of the accuser and the judicial system. Paltrow, played with hair-tossing vivacity by Diana Vickers was charged with injuring 76-year-old Terry Sanderson (played by Marc Antolin, looking irreverently youthful) on the ski slopes. He sued for US$300,000 claiming that she had skied into him, knocking him out, causing a brain injury and four broken ribs”. She claimed that he had skied into her, implying it might have been a sexual assault, and counter-sued for US$1.
The court case, broadcast around the world at the time, is memorable for some unintentionally funny lines of their own (where, for example, even though Terry claimed he had lost his memory as a result of the impact, Paltrow countered by saying that she had also suffered loss – the loss of half a day’s skiing).
In such a small town, the judge (played with irrepressible energy by Idriss Kargbo) and lawyer, Kristin (played magnificently by Tori Allen-Martin) are torn between justice and star-stricken sycophancy. Liberally peppered with references to vagina-scented candles and brand-named vibrators, the audience doesn’t have to be expert on the case or Paltrow’s business interests in sexual wellness products in order to enjoy this play. It is, after all, something of a fantasy-reading of events even though there are enough comedy lines that are actually taken from the case.
Kristin’s cringeworthy fangirl comments are a case in point, but Allen-Martin carries them off with brilliant comic timing and an exquisite lip-curl.
While the court goes into recess, the judge (here named Judge Jude, brother of his slightly better-known sister) seizes the moment to break into an exhausting and brilliant Rupaul-esque drag routine. Both Kargbo and Allen-Martin have the best lines and mesmerising moves, but that is not to distract from the terrific performances of Terry – and his own Cabaret solo – and “Gwynny P” who gets the big final number. And, of course, her whispered line to Terry “I wish you well”.
This is a must-see for theatre lovers. At only 60-minutes it packs in more laughs, more excitement, more inventive lyrics and memorable tunes than in most other West End favourites at three times the length. Tickets are reasonably priced, seats are available, and you will leave the theatre completely invigorated.
I Wish You Well. Criterion Theatre. Until 12 October 2024
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